Monday, June 25, 2018

Those Three Words: A Birthmother's Story of Choice, Chance and Motherhood

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I was contacted by the publisher, Wise Ink Creative Publishing, and offered a digital copy in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Rating: 3.5 Stars

This is a story that far too many women of all ages can relate to. For a multitude of reasons that are most often deeply private, there are women who are forced to make a decision that they don't want to make - to give a baby up for adoption. In the author's case she was eighteen at the time, and had just started college when she discovered she was pregnant. I can imagine how scary this would be to someone who is legally an adult, but has only recently struck out on their own for the first time, away from family. I connected to this story because, though I was not 18 at the time (I was 29), finding this out was so overwhelming for me. I too was far from my family and in a new city where I knew no one. I had just started a new job, so there had been many changes going on. My daughter's father and I had broken up the very week I found out I was pregnant with Eleanor. Luckily I was in a better situation - I already had two degrees and a secure job. Still, there were so many emotions that come along with "those three words", it was a rough couple of weeks. I never considered any option besides having and raising my child, but I received a lot of advice from a lot of people. I was simply better equipped to be able to do so, and I think Bauer made a gut-wrenching but correct choice.

The author's journey from considering suicide to making the decision to give her baby up for adoption was incredibly moving. This is a decision that will impact the rest of her life, and really is a testament to a mother's love. Bauer knew she was not capable of caring for a child when she was still a teenager herself. How could she, when she had just started college and had yet to gain the necessary knowledge and skills to obtain employment that would comfortably support herself and a child?

The aspect I was most interested in was when Bauer and her daughter, Katie, made contact later in life. I found this to be a great reinforcement of the decision Bauer made. Katie had been placed in a loving home and had thrived. I found myself worrying a bit that the reunion would not happen, or that Katie might not want to attempt a relationship. I think the fact that Katie's family was supportive of that relationship is another testament to that same parental love.

4 comments:

  1. This looks like a very emotional read. I don't have children but did have a couple of pregnancy scares in my late teens. Considering my mental state at the time it was fortunate they were only that and I can't begin to imagine how strong I would have needed to be to make a responsible decision like Christine did.

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    1. Agreed! I can't imagine the difficulty of making the decision to give a baby up for adoption. I don't know if I could make the decision to have an open adoption either, it would be so hard. But it was refreshing to see that this really seemed to work out for everyone, and they can grow into a new relationship as they get to know one another.

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  2. I’m currently reading this book which is how I discovered your blog. Love the name of your blog, it gave me a bit of a chuckle.

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    1. Thank you, I am glad it made you chuckle; it came about by accident! When I was creating my blog I tried all these cute, witty names but all of them were already in use. I literally threw my hands up in the air and said, "Ugh, all the book blog names are taken!" ...and thus my blog was born :)

      When you're done with the book I'd love to talk about it!

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