Wednesday, February 17, 2021

BookSirens ARC | Fallible: A Memoir of a Young Physician's Struggle with Mental Illness


I received a free digital copy via BookSirens in exchange for an honest review.

Rating ⭐⭐⭐

I appreciate the author's experiences and his willingness to share his struggles of what most would consider deeply personal. Unfortunately the stigma surrounding mental illnesses is still in full effect so this makes it difficult for so many to speak up when they need help. Books like this are important, because it helps others going through these same struggles feel less alone. However, sometimes these books can also end up overwhelming their intentions when they involve many threads and do not all seem to connect in a complete way for the reader.

The author does not shy away from the realities of life as a med student and resident, while dealing with anxiety and depression, while also being a young husband and eventually father. It was frustrating to read about these older physicians often taking out their own anger or issues on residents, or just power-tripping for no reason. That mental strain alone would cause plenty of mental health issues on their own.

I have to say, straight-up, referring to his anxiety and depression as a "gargoyle" really got old quickly. Perhaps we can more quickly get rid of the stigma of mental illness if we simply refer to it as what it is, instead of trying to characterize it differently.

There is a lot going on here and while memoirs can often be kind of scattered at times, this one felt scattered due to the many complex issues all at play at once. The author talks about his religious life as a member of the Church of Latter-day Saints, and we see how that faith kind of ebbs and flows as he gets through med school and goes onto his residency. I am curious about whether or not his faith had anything to do with his reaction or outlook regarding therapy. I do not know a lot about the LDS church and what their stance is on psychiatry, but I wondered if that played a part, as it always seemed to be a negative experience for him - in the brief glimpses we got of that aspect of his dealing with his anxiety and depression. In fact, I would have liked to known more about that avenue, because the discussion of therapy sometimes seemed like an afterthought. There was the issue of meds and them working or not, but nothing in-depth.

This book takes many routes at once, and they don't always converge with one another. At certain points in the book it was definitely about Jones and his struggles with internally dealing with everything. Other times it was about how literally everything outside of him was only making his battles worse.

I guess the picture is disjointed, but when dealing with mental illnesses, that is often the reality, so it does make sense in that regard. Despite my issues with the text I still think this is a valuable contribution to the books and memoirs specifically that deal with such topics.

8 comments:

  1. it sounds like he's still got work to do... maybe writing the book was part of that... interesting

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    1. Agreed. Being able to look back at it all is part of the process of dealing with it, I'm sure.

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  2. It's sad that mental health issues continue to be stigmatized even in this day. And it is important that those who experience them are able to write about it and publicize the experience for others so that understanding can grow.

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    1. Yes! I think I had more of an issue with the writing style than most other things. The book has an audience, it just might not be me.

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  3. I agree that books about mental illness are important, especially to combat the stigma against it.

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    1. 100% Depression and anxiety are so common and people act like they are just things you can shut on and off. I have not struggled with those personally, but so many do and it is about time we stop acting like it is something to hide.

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  4. Books that deal with mental illness are very important but I completely understand how the author's word choice to refer to his anxiety could be frustrating.

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    1. Right and I think the book has an audience for sure. But that and the writing style were just not working for me.

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