Crazy Town, Revisited

Some of you may recall that a few months ago an author created a major stir on Goodreads and Twitter because of less-than-stellar reviews she received for her book. Due to all the hoopla, I went to Amazon and got a copy for free via Kindle Unlimited. As I was reading the book, I tweeted various quotes. Then I wrote up my review, and that was that.

This week I received a notice from Twitter about removing the Tweets because the author filed a complaint against me. No big deal, they can be removed. In a blog post, however, she made a serious accusation that is not true and I want to address it.

She accuses me of somehow tampering with her book and claims that is how I was able to post the whole thing on Twitter.

WRONG

First of all, I in no way tampered with the book file - I don't even know how that would be possible. I was reading the book on my Kindle because I got the it from KINDLE UNLIMITED, and I used this neat feature on my phone where I talk and it types what I am saying - that is how I tweeted various quotes. Secondly, I did not post anywhere even close to the whole book. That would be completely pointless. I posted quotes as I was reading - much like a reviewer uses quotes in their reviews. 

I considered not addressing this at all, but I am not about to have someone straight-up lying about something I did not do. You may draw your own conclusions about who the author is but please keep it to yourselves. I do not wish to give this any further attention beyond this post and will delete any comments that name her or the book.

Thank you,

Sarah

Book Review | Watch A Career Implode in Real Time or, The Wrythe and the Reckoning

Rating: 1 Star

Guys. This book is bad. So, so bad.

This post is long, but worth it.

You may or may not be aware that maybe a week and a half/two weeks ago or so, there was a huge uproar from the author where she attacked reviewers, called everyone shady, referred to a "Goodreads Mob" (there are t shirts now. I want one), and in general behaved like an ass-hat. I followed the drama on Twitter and let me tell you, it was very surreal watching a career implode in real time. The author went NUTS. Because people did not like her book. But here's the thing: the review that she went off on and was super snarky and rude on, was a review posted back in February of 2019. You can see it on Goodreads HERE (the review is from a Goodreads member named Rhonda, from Feb 6, 2019). It's not a mean review; it is critical, but constructively so. At no point did the reviewer speak in any way that was bullying or condescending. She tried several times to resolve the situation and was far more patient than I would have been, because this author was so far out of line, it's not even funny. The author then went on to show out, claiming that the reviewer had only read part of the manuscript on NetGalley, that ARCs should not be reviewed anywhere but NetGalley, that the reviewers should not have uploaded it to Goodreads, and a bunch of other bullshit that makes no sense.

FIRST OF ALL: ARCs submitted to NetGalley are books that are pretty much ready for publication. There may be typos, punctuation errors, etc, but ARCs are in no way the same thing as rough drafts. ARCs are books that do not need major plot revisions, and are all but good to go for the masses. This author submitted a rough draft to NetGalley and basically appears to have used it as a beta service.

Say what?

No, honey. No, no, no.

Rough drafts get workshopped. Rough drafts get entrusted to close friends who can edit, and can tell you what works and what doesn't. Rough drafts get edited by someone you pay to do that, and is CRUCIAL to the process.

Second of all, NetGalley wants users to have platforms where they review books and post said reviews in order to drum up attention for publication day. That's the whole point of NetGalley. NetGalley provides places for reviewers to link their social media platforms. They even have a button that allows reviewers to post their review directly to...you guessed it, GOODREADS. It is not only encouraged, it is expected whenever possible.

Thirdly, no one "illegally uploaded" this book to Goodreads. Books are often added automatically to the database. I can't tell if this chick doesn't understand Goodreads either, but you can not actually read a book from Goodreads. Her book was not uploaded. A page was created to represent her book, where reviewers can leave ratings and reviews, like literally every other book on the planet (or darn close, anyway.)

Naturally, I could not resist taking a look at the book because, holy shit, this was a meltdown of epic proportions. Like, she could not get herself together. I get that your book is your baby, you spend years working on it, you pour your heart and soul into it, you want to succeed. But here's the thing: Once you publish, it is not your baby anymore. You are opening up your work to be critiqued and if you don't want criticism, then don't publish. Not everyone will like your work. Some will even hate it. That is why authors (especially new authors) are told to never ever ever look at reviews, never Google yourself, DO NOT GO THERE. There were so many people, both reviewers and authors, trying to calm her down, to point out how her actions were reflecting poorly on her, how attacking reviewers is crossing a huge boundary, and so on. Some fellow authors were all but begging her to step away.

And you know what she did to everyone trying to help her not destroy her career before it got started?

She blocked them.

After watching this unfold, someone mentioned in a Tweet that they had gotten the book for free so I wandered on over to Amazon and wouldn't you know, there is was for Kindle Unlimited. I snapped it up and the rest is history.

Except this will not end there, because I not only read the book, I live-Tweeted quotes as I was reading, and a jolly little group joined me in constantly going 'wtf does that even mean?!" and sending me GIFs to encourage me to keep going, as well as providing comic relief.

Because, the book is bad. Like, reeeeally bad. The editor in me almost threw the Kindle within the first few paragraphs. I thought my brain was going to explode. Luckily, the GIFs and encouragement kept coming, and it only took a week or so to read that entire fucking book and let me tell you, if you want a clusterfuck train wreck, this is exactly what you are looking for.

For starters, the writing is tedious and pedantic. It is one of the most boring books I have read, where ALMOST NOTHING happens in the 800+ pages. The writing is stilted and formal, very robotic-like. In fact, we often joked that it was like aliens or robots were sent to Earth to study human language, and still managed to get it terribly wrong. I also likened it to being written by a robot, but that robot had been programmed to write it by another robot, so it ended up sounding ridiculous anyway. We get so many unnecessary details about simple things, like walking across the room, or taking part in a conversation. Every. Little. Detail.

There are tons of commas all over the place, often everywhere except where they should be. Lots of misused words also. I can not even tell you how many dudes were assholes and she referred to them simultaneously as gentlemen and scoundrels. Seriously. We are also regularly given these absolute bat-shit insanely long descriptions of things that don't even matter. Like, she goes on and on describing the characters wandering around. Legit. The main character, Lina, wanders A LOT. She wanders around her hometown/village/city of Deerfield. BTW, despite only having 250 residents, the village has a community center where there is a quilting club that her mother is a member of.

A community center. That's how the characters describe it.

She then proceeds to wander around Boston every day after work, with her BFF Xander who is secretly in love with her, even though it was not a secret because the book is utterly predictable and boring.

AND don't even get me started on all the OTHER historical inaccuracies.

Just kidding, of course I am going to lay them all out, because they are RIDICULOUS.

If you have read my blog for a while, you know that history is my thing. You also know that I don't read a lot of historical fiction, especially about the periods I love, because too often authors will change up things we know, make shit up about things we don't, and all around just fuck it all up.

So, we have a lot to cover. AND WE HAVE NOT EVEN GOTTEN TO THE HUMAN-MONSTER YET! More on this in a bit.

I consulted my audience from the live-Tweet storm where I quoted the book as I read it, and asked what most stood out to them in regards to these inaccuracies. I had several in mind and was not at all surprised to see that we were all petty much floored by the same nonsense.

(Something I forgot to mention: the book is set in the 1850s.)

1. At one point the main character, Lina, gets a job at a textile mill after her family moves to Boston. But this mill is special. Even though the mill treats workers badly by upping quotas and paying them less than before, every day THEY GET A FREE AND HEALTHY LUNCH. Yes, the mill provides fresh fruits and a square meal every single day. Perhaps the mill should have been placed in Silicon Valley instead. Workers also got two breaks, though it is not clear if those breaks were in addition to lunch, or lunch was one of the two.

2. The daily schedules of the characters, both when they lived on their farm in Deerfield, and then when they moved to Boston. They had free time and extra money, even though they were poor because they lost their house in Deerfield and that's why they had to move to begin with. They were described as doing chores at random times day or night on the farm, had no chores when they moved to the city, and always had money to purchase food in sports bars.

3. Okay, so they were not called sports bars, but they fit that description. Lina and her BFF Xander would wander around the city for hours after work, seeing the city, and would dine at various diners, cafes, etc. They even got coffee TO GO! FROM A BARISTA! SHE USES THAT WORD! A WORD NOT INVENTED UNTIL THE END OF THE 20TH CENTURY! Not to mention, Xander took Lina to a billiards hall, otherwise known as a saloon. Women would not have entered these establishments unless they were prostitutes or working there. But never mind, Lina can do whatever she wants and ignore all social norms and expectations. Which she did. All the time.

4. Speaking of extra money, Lina and her family read dozens and dozens of periodicals. When they lived in their tiny village of Deerfield (the one with the community center, remember?), their local mercantile stocked newspapers and periodicals from AROUND THE COUNTRY. Including many feminist-leaning publications. Because those existed in the 1850s. Along with feminism. Maybe if the family would have spent less money on their newspapers, they could have kept their house.

5. There was mention of an all-women's medical college in Missouri. Again, in the 1850s. In fact, though there were not a lot, there were all-women's college in existence, according to the characters. Again, it was set in the 1850s.

6. Despite not having computers or the Internet, or any technology at all to help locate information, Lina was always able to find what she needed at the library. Libraries did not exist like that in the 1850s. I just can't even.

7. When Lina and Xander finally get engaged, Lina shops for a wedding dress and bridesmaid dresses. And employs a wedding consultant. And has a tiered wedding cake, and a reception. Despite the fact that in that period, weddings were typically in the morning and the reception would have been breakfast.

8. One of my personal faves, was how a recruiter from a textile mill in Massachusetts came to their tiny town of Deerfield, New Hampshire (I think New Hampshire, I honestly can't remember) to recruit Lina's sister Abby to work at the textile mill there. A RECRUITER! And on top of that, Abby was given two months to get to Massachusetts to start her new job!

9. Transportation is hilariously ridiculous. All transports are described en masse as 'vehicles'. Boston has wagons, trams, omnibuses, horsecars, etc. I mean, seriously.

There are so, so , so many more, but these are just some of the highlights. Now let's get on to the one aspect of the story that could have been interesting, but ended up being a gigantic failure, just like everything else in the book: the human-monster.

There are all these random news reports of people being attacked by someone or something roaming in the forests. People describe it as being human-like, but the murder victims have scratches and gouges and all that. But there is hardly anything about this aspect of the story, and it is not until the latter part of the book when Abby and Lina are returning from a random ball a few hours away that their coach is attacked by the human-monster. Sadly, Lina and Abby have a coach driver who was prepared for such an encounter, by having his shot gun with him, and they survive. Up to this point in the story Abby (and pretty much everyone else) has been extremely skeptical that this human-monster thing is even real, and even after it attacks their coach, she thinks that the coach driver over-reacted. Throughout the entire book, the one part that could have been marginally interesting is treated as a myth or legend, despite the fact that people keep going into the forests and getting murdered in the same way. So...yeah. That's all I've got on this human-monster thing. Apparently Lina and Xander wandering around the city was far more important.

This book tries to do too much and fails miserably in every aspect. Lina and her family are all these super progressive, forward-thinking people who are feminists and abolitionists. I think the only thing the author gets right is that the Underground Railroad was referred to as such in that time period. But then we get all these reports of Lina sewing items "for the Underground Railroad". Okay, great, if we are going to get all this excruciatingly detailed info on Lina's walks around Boston day after day, let us know what she is making. But nope, it is only that same phrase over and over.

There is also no real ending, because the author intends this to be a duology. It literally just...ends. I read the entire book, all 813 pages as it is described on Amazon, and honest-to-God, it ended with Lina and Xander staring off into a sunset.

This book is not a love story. It is not a supernatural story. It is not a progressive story about a young woman far ahead of her time. It is a clusterfuck vanity project by an author who has no respect for her potential audience.

Queen of Thieves: The True Story of "Marm" Mandelbaum and Her Gangs of New York

EDIT: 10-3-19

Rating: 0 Stars

Author Behaving Badly Alert

I love when authors throw around 'credentials', as if that somehow exempts others from having opinions about their trash books. As for the movie option...hopefully they have a great screen writer to deal with horribly sexist and repetitive source material 😂

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Original review posted 12-4-18
Rating: 1.5 Stars

Such a wholly fascinating woman deserves a much better book.

Prior to reading this, I had never heard of Fredericka Mandelbaum, described as a "poor Jewish woman who rose to the top of her profession in organized crime during the Gilded Age in New York City" (from the book page on Goodreads). When I found this one, it was a no-brainer, OF COURSE I would read it. Gilded Age New York is on of my favorite periods to read about and I am always on the lookout for new subjects from the era.

The problem then, is literally everything else. I can not count the number of times her appearance is referenced. We are told as many ways as possible that she was a large and unattractive woman. Finally the author gave in on what he seemed to be waiting for the whole time and simply called her fat. It was truly gross how often her physical characteristics were mentioned - as though it is somehow unusual that supposed ugly people find success in whatever avenue they pursue for their career of choice? Whatevs, I've no time for that. And normally, I would have chucked this to the DNF pile after the fifth, twelfth, zillionth time her appearance was mentioned. But I persevered because I know of no other books about "Marm" and wanted to glean as much information as I could, despite a completely sub-par attempt to give this woman a proper biography. One might be able to shrug this off despite the ABSURD amounts of repetition, except the author then goes on and does the same thing to one of Mandelbaum's proteges, Sophie Lyons, who he mentions time and again as being beautiful, using her looks to get out of trouble, etc. The complete and utter reliance on talking about appearances was not only ridiculous, but repetitive, repetitive, repetitive. Like, almost word-for-word repetitive sometimes, as we will get to in a moment in regards to the other colorful characters who fill the pages.

I am trying to not be a total negative nelly in reviews because writing is hard, and authors pour so much of themselves into their books. But said book has to be edited, it just does, there is no way around it. I feel like perhaps another couple of rounds with a good editor could drastically improve the text. I was at first impressed by the use of contemporary sources, but for quite a stretch there it seemed that those sources were taking up more room than the author's own commentary and/or analysis of said sources. I feel like this book has potential, but will never see that as long as the book remains as-is. Mandelbaum's story is practically THEE American Dream. She reached a height of wealth that others could only dream of, with the protection of the police, judges, and Tammany Hall. While it was not by honest means, for a Jewish woman to do so, while her husband turned a blind eye and knew "nothing" of her fencing stolen goods, is an honest to goodness miracle.

Despite all the repetitiveness, I did learn quite a bit about Mandelbaum's life, family, and her career. Her trial is covered as well, and on top of that, her escape to Canada. We are also, again REPEATEDLY, reminded of who her attorneys were, that they are partners, that she retained them for several thousand dollars a year, that she aided her circle of thieves in getting out of charges, who her attorneys were, that they are partners, that she retained them for several thousand...oh wait, sorry, I just realized I was REPEATING MYSELF.

I did select a few quotes of interest, because I do feel like Mandelbaum's story is worth telling, worth knowing. It just needs to be in the hands of a better editor, and possibly writer as well.

"At the height of her criminal career, every New Yorker knew their best chance to realize a profit from their ill-gotten gains was to trust "Marm" Mandelbaum. She was also partial to helping young women get a foothold in the criminal world. She was once quoted as saying that she wanted to help ant women who "are not wasting life being a housekeeper." Because of her efforts to help women find work, even if it was in the world of crime, some contemporary feminist historians view Mandelbaum as a Gilded Age heroine for her willingness to assist women finding work and helping them make more money than they could have as housekeepers, maids, seamstresses, or factory workers" (2%).

More than a couple times, the author mentions that Mandelbaum opened a "school for crime". How would this even work? Like, seriously, the logistics simply are not there. How does one go about opening a school for crime, and operating la-di-da like it is no big deal. Obviously police officers on the beat would have to be paid, but how was this ever a thing? We are given almost zero other information about it, which I expected because it would have had to have been pretty secretive - but how do we then have any knowledge of it to begin with? The story concludes with the author stating Mandelbaum "...allegedly had to close the school when it was discovered that that son of one of the city's most prominent police officials was enrolled in it" (3%). Really? Later the author comes back around to this topic, as he often and repetitively did, but this time at least added further information about this so-called 'crime school'. He detailed the 'courses' offered and marveled at the fact that the school was quite near the police headquarters. Mandelbaum apparently offered all kinds of classes to any aged pupil, and both male and female students. They learned about burglaries, safe-cracking, and blackmailing rackets. Additional advanced classes were taught as well in those areas, while supposed "doctoral level" classes were offered in confidence schemes and blackmail. Students who were particularly astute were given free advanced courses, and the "best and brightest graduates were offered salaried positions with Mandelbaum, but they had to turn over everything they stole directly to her and no one else". The school operated for roughly six years according to the author, until again we are told that the son of a police official was discovered as being enrolled, and thus Mandelbaum closed the school. I suppose when you pay the right people, anything is possible.

I did appreciate the author really setting the backdrop for how and why a life of crime might be necessary for survival in this period. it might sound a little sensational to someone unfamiliar with the city at the time, but I do feel like this quote sums up quite accurately what life what like at that time for those not part of the 'gilded' set.

"The worst of all the slums was the villainous Five Points in the Lower East Side, a den of almost unspeakable gore and horror. It was the home to the city's most vicious criminals, robbers, prostitutes, and confidence men. Five Points derived its name from the crisscrossing intersection of Anthony, Cross, Mulberry, Orange, and Water Streets. There were no legitimate businesses in Five Points except for a very few grocery, dry goods, and clothing shops. It was filled with narrow streets alleys running every which way...the nearly falling down tenements and sheds there housed hundreds of poor immigrants who were at the mercy of the gangs, many of whom worked for absentee landlords collecting rent...Day or night Five Points was the scene of an uncontrolled abundance of murder, mayhem, robbery, and theft. No one, including the police, dared to venture into this den of thieves and murderers..." (7%).

Here I have also chosen to include some of the many instances where the author refers to Mandelbaum's appearance. I did not include all of them, as there were so many. By 8% her height and weight had been referenced three times.

"At close to six feet tall and 250 pounds, she was a formidable presence. She was easy to pick out of any crowd" (8%) Not so bad, right? But then...

"...her clients, both sellers and buyers, knew that this huge, dark-eyed, corpulent woman didn't question whether the merchandise she traded in was legitimately or illegitimately acquired" (10%).

Also: "...as an outcast herself, both physically (her height and weight making her stand out)..." (10%)

And "Already an imposing physical presence, she kept her outward appearance unobtrusive...despite her criminal vocation and her height and her girth..." (20%)

And still more. "Mandelbaum saw in the young and beautiful Lyons the image of how she wished she had been. Mandelbaum, tall, fat, and unattractive was drawn to the waif-like beauty of Lyons" (37%). There are others also, but I think by this time one gets the point. The author is utterly fixated on what he perceives as her grotesque appearance and can not leave it for a moment. It is a constant throughout and totally unimportant.

While on the whole, this book is in need of some serious changes for it to be a worthwhile read, there is valuable information in there if you have the patience to wade through the rubbish and find it. Mandelbaum was no saint, but she was an unique woman living in difficult times. She managed to stay out of jail throughout her entire career, not for lack of trying on the part of reformers seeking to end the corruption at all levels. Even during the trial that would effectively end her career in NYC, she managed to elude the Pinkerton detectives who had so painstakingly built a case against her for months. Mandelbaum was highly intelligent and a more than capable foe for those seeking to put her and similar operations out of business for good.

"On February 26th, 1894, Fredericka Mandelbaum died in her home in Hamilton surrounded by her family and Stoude. The cause of death was reported as Bright's Disease, described in modern medicine as a chronic form of nephritis or kidney disease. She was sixty-five years old.  Although the obituary notice that appeared in the Hamilton Spectator took note of her criminal past, it called her 'a woman of kindly disposition, broad sympathies, and large intelligence'".

Mandelbaum deserved a much better biography than this.