FUCK THE PATRIARCHY | The Seven Necessary Sins for Women and Girls

I do not recall exactly how I first learned of Mona Eltahawy. Somehow this video came across my Twitter feed and I was completely enthralled by what she was saying, by the power in her voice, her absolute certainty in what she was saying, all the words I have ever wanted to hear.

As a result of the discussion, ABC Australia removed this Q & A session from its website altogether but here is the banned episode in its entirety.

There is truly no way for me to "review" this book in the traditional sense. I originally checked it out from the library but it was clear within the first chapter that I would need my own copy, as my fingers were just itching to highlight and underline and scribbles notes to myself in the margins.

Even after I finished the book within a couple hours, I could not stop thinking about. I just sat there, clutching the book to my chest, knowing that finally FINALLY, here was someone telling me that my rage is righteous and justified. It's not in my head, I am not too much. I am here, I count, I am 100% unapologetically me.

"We must make patriarchy fear us. We must reject politeness; there is nothing polite about patriarchy. We must reject civility; there is nothing civil about racism or misogyny or transphobia. Warnings precede profanity, to protect the sensibility of the reader; where are the warnings that precede patriarchy to protect the lives of women and girls? Curse words are bleeped out of television and radio broadcasts; how to we bleep out patriarchy?" (pg 76)

Fuck anyone who doesn't like it. Fuck anyone who wants me to be nice, to be civil. FUCK YOU, PATRIARCHY.

I feel this book so deeply in my soul. The words have seeped into my skin, my bones, my very being. I have always considered myself a feminist, but after reading this brilliant work, I feel different. I feel more. I am radicalized. I can face patriarchy head-on and smash it into tiny fucking pieces, pieces so small that it can never even hope to put itself back together again.

Eltahawy is strong and brave and powerful. She has shown me I can be those things, too. I can raise Eleanor this way, to raise her fist, shout "FUCK THE PATRIARCHY" and to understand the weight of the words, to understand that she too is declaring war on a society not built for her. That she can bring that society down, and create a new one where all women are free.

I started reading various paragraphs out loud to Eleanor the night I bought my copy and found myself at a loss when she first asked what patriarchy meant. How do you explain systemic oppression of women and girls (don't forget to factor in that things get drastically worse when you also consider race and socioeconomic status of those women and girls) to a seven year old? Even a seven year old as intelligent and thoughtful and curious as mine?

Mona to the rescue! I tweeted this very predicament to her and she responded shortly with a video she had previously recorded doing just that, explaining what patriarchy means in as kid-friendly terms as you can get. Eleanor and I both appreciated this very much.

I don't know that I can ever truly convey what this book means to me. No words do it justice.

But I know what it means to patriarchy: your days are numbered.