Kid Lit Must-Read | A Kid's Book About Racism

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I love this whole series, but this one might be my favorite so far. Simple text and imagery with the words themselves, as well a differing colors, make this a must for school and public libraries, and personal ones as well. It is a great starting part to talk to your kids about racism because it is a hard conversation that must happen. As my good friend Daryetta says, if her Black sons are old enough to experience racism, white children are old enough to learn about racism.

After George Floyd was murdered and our country was on fire with rage and pain and fear and trauma, I began explaining more and more to Eleanor what racism is. It could not have been avoided even if I had wanted to. This is something that has never occurred to her in her entire seven and a half years. She has had a lot of questions - especially because her best friend has beautiful caramel skin, and she can't ever imagine anyone not liking her BFF because of that. Eleanor knew that I had attended multiple protests at times when she was at her dad's house, and she had many questions about the protests as well. We also attended a smaller women's rally/march at the courthouse on a beastly hot afternoon over the summer with her BFF, plus BFF's siblings and their mom. Eleanor and her BFF stood there talking to news crews, holding hands, trying to explain to grown-ups just how absurd and wrong it is to judge people by the color of their skin. Nobody coached them on what to say, they simply answered the reporter's questions as regular seven-year-olds who so clearly saw then and still see now, what too many adults can or will not. Most of the women in attendance that day were in tears, including the reporter herself.

Teaching kids to be colorblind is not the answer. First of all, it is impossible. You can't not see someone's skin color. If you ignore it, you are ignoring a lifetime of their experiences. Teaching kids to love all colors and appreciate their beauty and uniqueness is the answer. We can fight racism with books like this, start those hard conversations with our children, and raise better humans.

Book Review | My Survival: A Girl on Schindler's List

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Preface: I have probably watched Schindler's List more times than most people, and it's not because I just loved it so much, I watched it for fun over and over again. No, the actual reason is because when I was a senior in high school, I was taking a class called 21st Century Writing. We have four major papers to complete over the trimester and for one paper, we were supposed to select a movie from AFI's Top 100 and analyze the various components of the film - lighting, sound, color, etc. I am the giant moron who chose Schindler's List, then proceeded to have to watch it repeatedly as I took notes, wrote, revised, rewrote, etc. I have not watched it since. I can't. Ten+ times was enough and I may well only watch it once more in my lifetime - with Eleanor when she is old enough.

If you are unfamiliar with Schindler's List (and really, this should be no one), it tells the story of a German businessman who ended up saving approximately 1,200 Jews from certain death. He does this by employing workers from Krakow's Ghetto, keeping them safe and healthy and fed. To be fair, his intent was not so noble in the beginning. A businessman to the core and a member of the Nazi party because it benefited him businesswise, he wanted cheap labor to keep his factories running, thereby growing more and more wealthy each day. However, he came to be protective of 'his Jews' and fought to keep them together, bribing whoever he had to in order to keep those destined for the camps safe within his factory. The scene near the end when he must leave because the camps are being liberated, and he in tears, sobbing as it comes to him that perhaps there was more he could have done, more he could have saved, even one more. If you doubt that Liam Neesen is one of the top five greatest actors of all time, then watching that scene alone will change your mind.

Rena Finder was born in Krakow and at age eleven the Nazis arrived in full force. She and her family, along with every Jew in the city, were moved to the Ghetto. From there they are sent to Plaszow, outside of Krakow and Rena and her mother begin working in a factory owned by Schindler. Plaszow is eventually closed and Rena, her mother, and hundreds of Schindler's other employees are sent to Auschwitz. Schindler is determined to save them, so he completely up and moves his factory. He has it reassembled near Auschwitz and was able to get his workers back. They survived the Holocaust because of his actions.

It was truly a thing of horrific beauty to get a story of the Holocaust from a child who survived it. Even younger than Anne Frank, and living through the trauma of life in the Ghetto, then the camps. To have the reprieve, then it all taken away with the mix-up that sent them to Auschwitz, that feeling of lose and despair. But then to be found once more, to be saved. She recalls these events in great detail, with a kind of clarity only a child can express. When that moment of liberation finally comes, it is almost hard to believe. After the years of uncertainty, not knowing if they would again be shipped off from the safety of Schindler's factory, to finally knowing they were free once more.

This is a must for any upper elementary/lower middle school classroom library, and especially important for teaching on the subject of the Holocaust. It would also make a great small-group book for study. Highly recommended.

BookSirens ARC: Sometimes When I'm Sad

 

I received a free digital ARC via BookSirens in exchange for an honest review.

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This book is absolutely stunning, incredibly beautiful, and exactly what our little ones need when they know/feel something is 'wrong', but they don't have the words yet to explain it.

I really hate when people say, "Don't worry, kids are resilient." While this is most often true, they shouldn't HAVE to be. Kids should not have to overcome trauma and bounce back from horrible events and circumstances. But they do, and far too often. So, unfortunately, we need books like this to help them cope.

Mental illness is very real, even among our youngest in our population. This book will do wonders in the right hands, letting children know their feelings are valid, whatever those feelings may be. Kids need strategies to deal with big emotions in a time when adults are needing the same things. If we can't cope, and overcome, we can not grow and move forward.

The book provides wonderful tools for adults as well, in how to help our children, to understand the difference between being sad and depression, and what we can do to make sure our children know we are here for them. Adults are given an overview of signs to look for when it might be something more than sadness. I feel like this is a must-have for any adults who work with children, especially psychologists, school counselors, and teachers. I will definitely be buying a copy for Eleanor, so she always knows that she can rest in whatever emotion she is feeling, feel it all the way through to the end, and then put it away once it has been dealt with properly.

What I really love about the book is exactly just what I envision and hope for for Eleanor. Sadness is a common, complex emotion. Telling kids to just smile and be happy is just about the worst thing one can do. Children internalize that, wonder what is wrong with them because they don't feel happy even when it looks like everyone else is, and those feelings of insecurity grow.

Sadness is completely embraced here, and given its space to just be. We need to learn how to also just sit and be with that sadness, or any other emotion. It is a hard skill to teach children, but is so critical for their emotional and mental health.

In the story, a young boy is dealing with some feelings and he doesn't yet know how to express those feelings in constructive ways. He hides often hides, or throws his toys. Treats and gifts do not help him deal with the emotions he is feeling. He then meets a counselor who gives the child different ways to help manage his sadness/depression and cope with this big, overwhelming feelings. He uses these throughout the remainder of the story. He says at the end that he still cries sometimes, but not for long because now he knows ways to help himself feel better. He is shown creative ways to create outlets for himself, and these are simple things that can be used by everyone, not just children - confiding in someone we know cares deeply for us, knowing they will not judge us or dismiss our feelings, is so so important for children especially.

Book Review | How Mamas Love Their Babies

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This book and what it attempts to do are both beautiful. Throughout the pages with simple text and captivating illustrations, we see the many ways that Mamas love their babies. Mamas love their babies by taking care of them physically, and working to support them. It also makes the message loud and clear: Mamas can have jobs that society looks down on (manual labor) or has hissy fits over (sex industry), and those Mamas love their babies just as much as Mamas in more 'normalized' job fields.

There are a few problematic things and I want to address them first. This book is beautifully diverse, but I question the choice to include the white mother and child with the 'We shall overcome' sign. I have taken Eleanor to a women's #BlackLivesMatter protest, but I would never have her holding a sign such as that. We are allies, there to support and uplift our Black and African-American Sisters, not to make it about us.

My other issue that I felt could have been explored is the idea of motherhood itself. The book starts off with describing how some mothers care for their babies inside their own bodies...and never comes back around to mothers who become mothers in other ways. Or who have children and are physically female, but do not identify as she/her. And honestly, that may have gone way over the heads of the age-range for this one, but everything else was made simple, and this could have been too.

Now, onto all the other reasons this one is still five stars even with my issues listed above.

Mamas do whatever they have to in order to make sure their babies survive and thrive. This book is a celebration of all kinds of jobs that mothers do in order to make that happen. Not only are a variety of jobs depicted, but so are a variety of women. Mothers of all races, ages, and body types are found within these pages and I think that is truly amazing. There are young mamas, obese mamas, and YES, breastfeeding mamas. As a mama who could not breastfeed for long no matter how hard she tried, I love this inclusion and I am pretty much fed up with all y'all who think women need to cover up in public. Boobs are not for you, they are for nourishing babies, so stop staring like a moron. And if you don't like seeing them, don't look. Not too difficult.

All families deserve to feel validated and I have said time and time again that representation matters. Kids need to see themselves reflected back in the books they read. Can you imagine how far this would go in making families feel valued, especially those families where mama works a job or two that is not considered 'normal'? And I am not just talking about the mama who is a sex worker. I am talking about the mamas who work in fields all day, the mamas who clean homes and office buildings, poor mamas just trying to make ends meet, mamas who work just as hard as any other mama to provide for her children. We see mamas who stay home, mamas who are pilots, artists, office workers, and so much more.

I do want to specifically address the sex worker mama depicted here. She is included in the pages where it talks about the kind of uniforms that mamas can wear while working, and how some mamas 'wear special shoes'. Mamas deserve to be celebrated for being mamas, for working hard to provide for their families. I absolutely want this book in my school library, because even if the children do not know what their mama does for a living, imagine how she would feel seeing herself reflected in a book that her child has brought home from school? Sex worker mamas are mamas and if you have a problem with that, well, you are the problem.

The illustrations did take some getting used to for me, mainly because I think the 70s were weird and awkward so that vibe was not my most favorite. However, after reading through it a few times, I liked how it all flowed together. They are real photographs depicting mamas and their children, along with the effect of crayons over some of the photos.

This is a wonderful book and deserves a place in every library - whether public, school, or home. Kids need to see themselves in the stories they read and we need to include all families in those depictions as well.

Highly recommended.

Book Review | Enough! 20 Protesters Who Changed America

Rating ⭐⭐⭐⭐

I am pretty torn on this one and keep going back and forth between four and five stars. I ultimately settled on four because they are some exclusions that I simply can not abide.

First, the positives. Each protester/s are given a full two page color spread with a statement about how they protested. For example, Kaep's page says, "Colin took a knee" and that is what his illustration shows. I think keeping that simple for very young readers is very important. There are a couple pages at the back that g into greater details (more on those later) but I feel like this simple text is great for creating curiosity in the child's mind for why that person did what they did, and how that means they were protesting.

The illustrations are gorgeous and fit well with the text.

Eleanor had tons of great questions about so many of the people and groups featured in this book and we looked up more information about many of them on kid/age-appropriate websites that would explain in a way she would best understand.

I appreciated that the author showed different kinds of protests - sitting down on a bus, going to school, raising a fist, singing, and so. Teaching children active and passive resistance and protesting is so crucial.

I appreciate that the author chose a variety of people and issues that have been at the heart of so many protests since the founding of our country. I do want to note that in some cases, those featured are not all necessarily protesters. There is a deep sense of activism and action across the entire book, but not all would be what we consider traditional protests. I think it is important to make that distinction for kiddos to help them better understand these complex issues. I also like that

With that in mind, while there is great representation of many races, not all are presented and that part is problematic for me. There is no inclusion of Indigenous people. The DAPL protests would have been perfect for this, but were no where to be found. Neither were there depictions of those who protest and rally for the untold numbers of missing Indigenous women. Given that so little attention is paid to these women in the media, this would have been a great platform and that is definitely a missed opportunity.

Aside from the absence of Indigenous protests/activism, Black Lives Matter itself was excluded. Now, with Kaep's protest actions being included, I can see why because the protests are largely the same in their end-goal. However, the protesting itself comes in many different and I think those distinctions are important to show.

Another reason for four stars instead of five is related to the addition material at the end of the book. I thought that would be a great resource, but found some of the information inaccurate or misleading. Parents will definitely want to look elsewhere to get further information about some of those featured in the book.

Even with the issues I have with the text, I still would recommend it as a great starting-off point for kiddos. It is simple for young readers, and older readers like Eleanor (age seven) will likely have plenty of questions to keep the conversations going long after the book is finished.

Book Review | If You're Going to a March

Rating ⭐⭐1/2

I had high hopes for this one, but ended up being disappointed. It is a very white perspective on what protests look like. It does not address what marches and protests often look like when People of Color are the ones on the front lines. One only needs to look at the obvious differences between what happened when a bunch of backwater hicks stormed into state capitol buildings around the country with their weapons out, threatening governors and attempting to get into Chambers. No officers in riot gear and gas masks there as these white men got in their faces, yelling and screaming. Only face masks to protect from COVID. Yet, one can imagine how very different those scenes would have played out had it been POC, or Black men in particular, doing the exact same thing. In fact, you don't have to imagine it. You can see it by looking at videos and images of the protests and marches that have been going on since George Floyd was murdered by four men on a street in Minneapolis. Protesting and marching does not look the same for People of Color as it does for white people, and unfortunately this book does not address that.

I do appreciate that the illustrator did show a great amount of diversity within the pages. We see families of all colors, in all shapes and sizes, preparing to attend a march. We see families arriving by all modes of transportation, people of all ages and cultures. This diversity continues page after page as the march moves through the streets.

Another major issue I have with the book is how it addresses both the presence of the police and the media also at the march.

"There will be police officers at the march. Their job is to keep people safe."

This line nearly made me want to throw the book across the room. We can argue day and night about good officers vs bad officers but here is the reality: If you have five bad officers who do bad things, and you have five supposedly good officers who look the other way though they themselves do not DO bad things, then you have ten bad officers. That is a fact. And if you read my account of the protests I have attended in recent weeks, it will be glaringly obvious that I had zero fear of my fellow protesters. But I made damn sure I always knew where the officers in our area were, because rubber bullets were constantly shot and people got hit with strays all the time. I feared the officers, NOT my fellow protesters.

"There will be reporters, too. Their job is to tell the truth. If you want to answer their questions, speak in a loud, clear voice."

This is also not true. One must only look to Faux News to see how their coverage of the protests is so blatantly skewed, they are telling out-right lies. I think this statement is far more true on a local level, usually. For the protest I mentioned that I took Eleanor to, along with a good friend and her children, this statement was 100% true. The reporter and her camera crew asked to interview the girls, and it was beautiful to see Eleanor and her BFF holding hands. They are truly a symbol that hate is something that is taught, not something you are born with, because these girls have loved each other since they first met in dance class four years ago. They've known each other more of their life now than not, and it has never once occurred to either of them that they are any different from one another just based on their skin. So many people around us were in tears listening to the girls talk, and it made me feel such pride.

I would obviously not have taken Eleanor to the first protest I attended a few weeks ago, given that the protest the night before had turned very violent with tons of rubber bullets, water bottles, and tear gas flying. I would not have trusted that I could have kept her safe from the tear gas or flash bangs or rubber bullets, because in truth it was the officers who were so unpredictable. Protests and marches can be chaotic though, without the violence, and the author really pushed the narrative of the peaceful protest. While I agree that is a good message to send to kids, I also think it is unreasonable to expect peace at this point looking at it through the lens of the protests for George Floyd and Rayshard Brooks. People of Color HAVE protested peacefully, and nothing has changed. We are still right back here again, the same place we were when Michael Brown was murdered and left in the street for hours.

I recognize that perhaps my own outlook is also still too narrowly focused at this time to appreciate this book in full. There are many things to protest in addition to the murder of Black men by police officers. But that is where the attention is right now, and when I was searching for picture books to add to my #BlackLivesMatter Reading List, this is one that came up over and over.

I appreciated the 'how-to' parts of the book, preparing kiddos for what they will need to bring with them, how to get to and from the march, and also how to conduct themselves around those who disagree with why they are marching. The book never actually says what the protest march is for, but the kids carry signed that say "Speak Up" in rainbow letters, "Do the Math (and Science", "Peace begins with me" and "Hate Has No Home Here". As the protesters march, at one point we see barricades have been put up on a sidewalk and a couple people with frowning faces watching the march go back. Of this the narrators says, "If you see people who disagree, be polite." I think that is also important, but also not always realistic - again especially when thinking about the current protests and marches happening here and around the world in response to the murders of Floyd and Brooks.

I will still read this one to Eleanor, but I will also address each point that I have mentioned above as things that bothered me while reading. I do not want to scare Eleanor away from her budding activism but I also want to be realistic. We have discussed many times what happened to George Floyd and how we are protesting to stop other Black men from being hurt or killed by officers who are supposed to protect the entire community. We've talked about how we see each person, color and all, for who they are as whole people. (Side note: Let's stop with this colorblind bullshit, okay? When you say you don't see another person's color, you are denying seeing part of who they are. Stop it.) We talk about how all colors of skin are beautiful, all cultures have great things to offer our world, and that we will remain on the right side of history, fighting, marching, protesting for justice that has too long been denied.

Book Review | Stonewall: A Building. An Uprising. A Revolution.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I found this book entirely by accident but am glad I did. I was searching for more books about Stonewall to read and use for my June podcast and this one came up so I requested it from the library, not really paying attention to the fact it was actually a children's book. Turns out, it is exactly what I was looking for without even knowing it at the time.

I love the fact that the story of Stonewall is told from the point of view of the building itself. The story begins in Greenwich Village of the 1840s, where men in top hats and horse-drawn wagons grace the pages. The building we know today was once two buildings, built for the affluent citizens of NYC to board their horses. Slowly Greenwich Village changed, and we see wealthier residents move away. The Village becomes a place for immigrants to settle, who had made long and tiring trips, from all over the world. Into the twentieth century the Village continues to evolve as cars take over as the new mode of transportation. Art galleries, theatres, bakeries, restaurants all find a home there and in 1930 those two long-ago stables have become one building that housed a restaurant named Bonnie's Stone Wall.

At this point in the story, long before Stonewall became Stonewall, the theme has not changed. Greenwich Village remains a place the Inn describes as being welcoming to all. By the time the building becomes a restaurant, the Inn tells us, "Celebrities, artisans, tourists, and local residents lunched at our tables, shoulder to shoulder" and "Greenwich Village was a place where you could be yourself, and where being different was welcomes and respected."

The Stonewall brings us into the 50s next, telling the reader of the Jazz musicians, poets, artists. Also, however, the Stonewall makes a point to say, "Leading up to the 60s, our neighborhood welcomed gays and lesbians - men who loved men, and women who loved women. We were a home for people who were told that they didn't fit in or belong."

Finally we arrive in 1967, when the Stonewall Inn opened its doors as a gay bar/dance club and welcomed people from all walks of life. I especially appreciate the illustrations on these two pages, and the diversity shown specifically here, which is definitely lacking on other pages (which I will address further in a moment). It can never be overstated how critical POC, especially trans POC, were to the uprising itself, so to see that diversity if crucial. "Women and men, young and old, teenagers, transgender people, drag queens, veterans, businesspeople, students, people of different colors, religions, and cultures, gathered, chatted, laughed, and danced under our roof."

The book does not shy away from the ugliness directed at those who frequented the bar, but it does clean it up a bit for the intended audience and I think this is important also. For many children this may be their first time learning about Stonewall, or the LGBTQIA+ community in general, and I think the author handles this in an age-appropriate way, saying that there were people who were not accepting of the community, stating that you could be arrested, fired, and/or kicked out of your home. The Stonewall goes on to talk about the constant police raids, showing citizens in an arrest wagon. Even so, says the Inn, the doors were kept open night after night for the community to return to.

Then suddenly here we are, at that fateful night, June 28th, 1969. Officers storm into the bar, demanding IDs and lining up club-goers, detaining and arresting whoever they wanted to. Unlike earlier raids, however, this time those who were let go did not actually leave. They did not fade away into the night but stood defiantly outside, pent-up anger seething through the crowd. It was unleashed when a woman being arrested yelled to the crowd, "Why don't you do something?"

So the crowd did. The Stonewall describes how the crowd unleashed that rage, yelling and screaming, moving back toward the bar. With this, the police barricaded themselves inside the very building they had just raided, calling for help in the form of the riot police. Windows were shattered, fires were lit, but still the rage swept through the crowd. For several days and nights, the Stonewall tells us, the uprising continued.

The following year what will become known as the first Pride Parade happens on the anniversary of the Stonewall Uprising. First there were hundreds who marched, but then all of those people AND their friends and families joined. The parade wove its way through the streets of NYC. They were not going to hide anymore.

Then the Stonewall Inn  brings us to the present day, and seems to shine so brightly, proclaiming that some things have changed since that night, and the laws of this country have changed as well. It makes reference to June being Pride month, and that there is still a long way to go toward full equality. The story ends with, "It all began one night here at the Stonewall Inn, when two old horse stables became part of history."

So, first, I loved this book. It is not perfect, but it is not problematic when you look at the whole picture. The illustrations are beautiful in that they are well-done and there truly is some great diversity on the pages. However, this was not consistent. Too often the crowds were very white, and as I mentioned above, POCs CAN NOT be overlooked in this movement. That is my only real issue with the book, because even when the pictures were lacking, the text was definitely inclusive in at least stating that people of all colors, religions, and cultures were welcome. This is actually stated twice, in the quote I gave earlier, then again when describing the first anniversary celebration. The illustrations are absolutely gorgeous, so that is what makes the whitewashing all the more troubling. White dudes did not run everything, so let's please have visual representations of everyone.

The illustrations were strong, however, in their ability to evoke a variety of emotions. It was easy to feel the emotions of that night especially, the anger and fear that people felt as they decided this would be the night where they said no more to acquiescing and disappearing into the darkness. The same is true throughout the entire book, however, and the illustrator's play with dark and light colors really captured each feeling splendidly.

When looking over other reviews, I noticed quite a few people were frustrated by the language used, mainly referring to the club-goers as gay or lesbian. Transgender was used, but was not defined until the glossary section. I think it is important to remember that in the late 60s there was not have this massive list of acronyms that we have today that more accurately describe the LGBTQIA+ Community. That's why at the time it was called the 'Gay Rights Movement', which the book refers to, with an asterisk stating it is now referred to as the 'LGBTQ+ Rights Movement'. I think it makes sense that gay and lesbian were the primary words used within the text, as that gave it more historical accuracy. Using terms that are common today in a book describing an event and movement in the 1960s would feel out of place.

I appreciate the fact that the night of June 28th itself was described in an age-appropriate way. While people do need to understand the violence that took place, that is not necessarily true for the age group, which to me feels like K-2nd grade. (I might be off with this though, considering I have an upcoming second grader who has been reading at a 4th/5th grade reading level for a while.) I don't feel like this was sanitizing or cleaning anything up to make it pretty, because again I come back to illustrations and how well they evoke the same emotions one would feel if the author had described in more graphic terms some of the events that night.

At the end of the story, there are some helpful extras included. First there is a black and white photo of the exterior of the Stonewall Inn that year, accompanied by a brief history. It is here that the author mentions the use of the word transgender and how it is much more common today than it was in the 60s. He adds, "...transgender individuals were instrumental in the Uprising, with some historians saying that trans women of color led it." That's pretty accurate and it would have been helpful if this would have been reflected more clearly in the artwork. The two pages following include more black and white photos of that night and the ensuing years. I was glad to see a photo of Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Ray Rivera included. Still beyond that there is a brief interview with Martin Boyce, and LGBTQ+ activist who was at the Stonewall Inn that night. Finally there is a glossary and websites and books listed for further reading, as well as the Making Gay History podcast.

Overall, I loved this book and think it is a great introduction to learning about this rights movement. I plan to read it to Eleanor to give her a better understanding as well. We have had conversations in the past, how anyone can love anyone else they choose (thought I admit I have so far stuck to binary language because she is six; a gender spectrum will be hard to grasp at her age), and it is not something out of the ordinary for her to see two men or two women holding hands. I have also begun discussing what transgender means and wouldn't you know, when I explained the meaning her reaction was, "Huh, okay." If kids can get there that easily, it should would be nice if more adults followed suit.

Highly recommended.

NetGalley ARC | Something Bad Happened

I received a free digital ARC from the publisher via NetGalley for an honest review.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From Goodreads:

When we learn about something bad - even when we hear only bits and pieces of it - our brains get busy trying to make sense of what we've heard. Seeing distressing events on the news, or hearing about them later, can feel scary and overwhelming. Talking about what happened, and how we feel about it, is hugely important.

Something Bad Happened guides children ages 6-12 and the adults who care about them through tough conversations about news of large-scale events, addressing questions such as: "Where did it happen?" "Why did it happen?" and "Will it happen again?" Feelings like sadness, fear and confusion are  normalized, and coping tools provided.

For children and parents to read together, or by a child with a parent nearby, this helpful resource by a child psychologist best-selling author provides comfort, support and action plans for children learning about the big bad things that happen in our world.

++++++++++++++++++

Easily one of the best books I have found so far to help young children understand the sometimes-scary world we live in. It does a phenomenal job showing that, even though these events are frightening, there are always people to help you figure out what is going on, and to process it. The book is a fantastic guide for parents on how to protect and inform their children, at the same time. It is also purposely general in order to encompass pretty much any 'bad thing' that you can imagine having to try to explain to your child.

This book would be useful for so many - parents, teachers, counselors, social workers, pediatricians, pastors/youth/children's ministers, basically anyone who cares for children in any capacity. To be clear, it is NOT for children/families who have been directly involved in a traumatic event. The author makes a point to directly state this. It is for those trying to process events that did not impact them directly, but have impacted their world in general, if only by the way adults are acting/behaving/speaking/not speaking, etc. We need to be able to guide our children through what seems to be increasingly turbulent times and this guide is a great starting point to do just that.

I thought specifically of Sept 11 when I first saw this book on NetGalley - not only for my students, but first for Eleanor. She is six and a half, and loves the Who Is/Who Was/What Is/etc series - you know, the books where the subject on the cover has a GIANT head and itty bitty body. The book about the Twin Towers is one that we own and we did start it months ago, but at one point Eleanor said she wanted to take a break from it because it made her sad. We will revisit it sometime in the future whenever she is ready, and with this book I will be even better prepared to help her understand the life-changing/world-changing event that occurred long before she was born, whose impact is still seen and felt today.

Additionally, every year on Sept 11, I teach my students about it. I have taught 3rd-6th grade and I appreciate the author's push for discussion and dialogue. I use material from kid-friendly, age-appropriate websites (such as readworks.org and BrainPop) to present the material to them, and give them the opportunity to ask as many questions as they need or want in order to make sense. It truly is so hard even for 6th graders to understand that day, the destruction on such a massive scale. After reading this, I have ideas on how to incorporate its suggestions into the lesson for my future students.

The introduction really helps adults understand how to use the book, and the author gives seven tips to help guide the conversations. The following chapters then focus on various points in the process - from finding out the bad thing that happened, calming oneself, learning information, identifying those who can help, dealing with a variety of emotions, caring for oneself, and finally - perhaps one of the most important - healing the world. Most of the chapters are 6-7 pages. The longest chapter is also one that it critically important - that of explaining the likelihood of a bad thing happening to someone. This is so crucial because it can help calm a child's worst fears, help them to understand that even though this bad thing happened, it does not mean it will happen to them. I like the examples that the author used, along with the illustrations, of using marbles in a jar to demonstrate possible vs likely.

It is sometimes so hard to know what or how much to say to younger children when something bad does happen. They will likely hear about it at some point, maybe from kids at school with older siblings, or overhearing a conversation between parents, etc. We have only so much ability to control what our children hear and when they hear it, and this book goes a long way in helping guide that process of understanding when a tragic event has entered their radar.

Personally, I do not ever share the "something bad" events with Eleanor. She is six. There is no reason to bring trauma and despair into her world, when there will be enough for her to see for herself when she is much older. I hate that books like this even need to exist, but there will come a day when she will see a news report, or hear a conversation, and I want her to come to me, to ask me questions. This book will be just the tool needed to start the healing process and show her that bad things happen, but we can understand the complex issues, work through them, and help try to make our world a better place.

Highly recommended.

NetGalley ARC | You Be You!: The Kid’s Guide to Gender, Sexuality, and Family

I received a free copy of this ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From Goodreads:

This is an illustrated children's book for ages 7-11 that makes gender identity, sexual orientation, and family diversity easy to explain to children.

Throughout the book kids learn that there are many kinds of people in the world and that diversity is something to be celebrated. It covers gender, romantic orientation, discrimination, intersectionality, privilege, and how to stand up for what's right. With charming illustrations, clear explanations, and short sections that can be dipped in and out of, this book helps children think about how to create a kinder, more tolerant world.

++++++++++

I LOVED this book and am so happy I found it. It is such a well-thought out guide to help children understand very complex topics. I love that it not only handled the topics of gender, sex, and orientation, but also intersectionality, privilege, being an ally, and discrimination. In fact, each of the latter have a chapter dedicated to them, just as the obvious topics did before them.

I really loved the illustrations, which are more or less anatomically correct. I also loved the fact that in addition to the gender, sex, and orientation diversity, there was a slew of ethnic and racial diversity too. So much about this book truly was perfect, that I will definitely be reading it to Eleanor in the future either from the library or our own copy. We have had conversations in the past, starting around age four or so, about how a person can love whoever they want - this came from a time when she saw two young men holding hands. Without overloading her brain at the time, I explained that boys can marry boys, or girls; girls can marry girls, or boys. As she gets older I will start addressing the gender spectrum and will definitely use this book to do so. The explanations and examples are so clear, it will do a much better job than I alone could.

NetGalley and Goodreads indicate the book is geared toward the 5-10 range and I would agree with that to an extent, but it runs about 80 pages. There's not a ton of text on each page, sometimes a paragraph or two, and illustrations abound, but it might still be hard for a five year old to listen for that long if you plan to read straight-through. I agree a lot with the blurb, stating it can be a book you 'dip in and out of', and maybe you read a chapter at a time. That is likely what I would do with Eleanor, because these definitely are complicated issues and I also want her to ask questions and not be overwhelmed with information and her own questions at the same time. And honestly, there are plenty of adults who stand to benefit from the overall message even if the content makes them uncomfortable: 

You be you! And help others be themselves.

It is literally the last line of the book, and one of the best. if we are trying to raise up the next generation to be kinder and gentler, I can't think of a better message. You are you, how you feel is okay, how you see yourself is okay, and no one has the right to make you feel ashamed or scared. If we want to truly support and understand one another, we have to be willing to open our minds and hearts and accept that the world is a big, diverse place, and that diversity in ALL its forms is a good thing. Regardless of any of the things that make us different, respect and kindness are key.

Highly recommended.

NetGalley ARC | My Dad Thinks I’m a Boy?!

I received a free digital ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

The story is both simple and complex - a little girl who wants to be herself and be accepted by both parents for who she is. We meet seven year old Stephie, who shares her favorite things. She loves bugs, scary movies, spaghetti, and reading. She also shares that her father thinks she is his son named Stephen, even though she is a girl named Stephie. This is something her mother understands, but her dad struggles with throughout the entire book. He is never malicious or demeaning, and Stephie loves her dad very much. But she also wants him to understand that Stephen doesn't exist.

The message is fantastic and positive - only we get to decide who we are, that is not up to any other human on earth. I felt on the first reading that the ending was kind of abrupt, but I've reconsidered that after I read through it again and again. I was glad from the first read that the dad did not suddenly do a complete about-face and accept that Stephen was now Stephie. While it would be wonderful if every parent reacted positively, we know that is not reality for so many kids who identify as trans, and would have been a slap in the face to all of those who struggle with unaccepting families and lack of support. BUT, showing them still having a close relationship at the end, I think, shows that they are still working on understanding each other and trying to figure out how to make it work. It is clear that they love each other very much, even as they are working through this complex issue together. Stephie is remarkably patient for a seven year old in how she does things for her dad (like going fishing) even if she doesn't want to. It is a bummer that children have to take on these adult roles of being patient teachers sometimes, but she handles it with ease and part of that is due to her young age. She intuitively knows that patience is important. It makes me incredibly sad for Stephie though, that this is placed on her shoulders. She must be the adult and teach her father, and it is not fair to her. Still, Stephie is resilient and stays true to herself. She is strong because she has to be, as so many other trans children have to be.

I really like that Stephie's interests are all her own. She knows she is a girl, and likes the things that she wants to like. In this case, they are not all things that are 'stereotypical' for a young girl to like. My cis daughter loves all kinds of things that are not stereotypical - garbage trucks and super heroes, mud, collecting rocks. BUT, she also loves dressing up, lip gloss, and wearing my high heels. I think everyone would be a whole lot happier if parents didn't try to force any gender stereotypes on their kids, regardless of gender.

I read this book on my Kindle and so I unfortunately can not comment on the illustrations/color, as everything is black and white for me. I think that I would still want this as a physical copy in our personal library, as well as a the school and public libraries. This needs to be visible for all students, but especially those who understand and can feel that they are not who the world thinks they are. I have never read a children's book before with a character who is trans. Having this visible for those students who know that they are not who others think they are is so critical - especially for those who do not have a lot of support at home. These kids need to know that it is okay and that nothing is wrong with them. Just as we need adequate representation for people of all races and ethnicities, trans kids, as well as non-binary and gender-nonconforming, need to see themselves represented as well. I can't even imagine what it would be like to not see myself represented in media, and I think it would be very disheartening. This can also help give those students the right words to express themselves, especially those who know very early on that something is not quite fitting correctly in their lives. So many of my gay friends have stated that they knew they were attracted to other boys from an early age, but didn't know how to express their thoughts and feelings to the adults in their lives. It also matters that cis children be educated and aware of the fact that they will have classmates at some point who fall into a wide variety of LGBTQIA+ categories.

Aside from the story itself, the author provides a slew of discussion questions and resources for parents and educators to use. I feel like this will be incredibly effective in discussing such complexities with their children. There are also several book suggestions that I will be exploring further.

I feel like this is a good starting point for younger readers and it a good contribution to children's literature. Stephie is very matter-of-fact. She knows who she is, and she stays true to that throughout. With books like this, it will help both trans kids to know they are not alone, and allies address the subject with kiddos who are not trans.

Good Night Stories for Rebel Girls 2

Rating: 5 Stars

Okay, so I STILL find the title problematic, but I gave this one five stars anyway, just like I did the first one, because the stories truly are what matter. For me the title is an issue because, if we want to normalize the success of women (for fuck's sake, it is 2019 and we still have to work at this shit!), we can't refer to these successful and brave women as rebels - and the little girls who read the stories as rebels also. I understand that yes, we are rebelling against the patriarchy and in that sense the title works. But I dream of the day when my daughter won't be thought of as a rebel or an anomaly because she does something fucking amazing for the betterment of humanity. Even so, I hope they continue the series, because there are so many women who I am learning about, and Eleanor has taken such an interest in so many of them.

One new feature that Eleanor and I especially liked about this book is that it included a world map to show where each woman was from. Eleanor loved finding the name and number each time we read, and always had to make sure she had found the location before we began reading. This gave me a great opportunity before or after to them discuss the place that woman was from, and their place in the world as a whole, and compared to where we are located. I hope future editions continue to include a map.

There were more contemporary women in this volume, which I appreciated because it gives Eleanor a sense of, these women are alive now, I can look up more information about them and continue to learn about them as they achieve even greater heights. One drawback to the book and the inclusion of 100 women per book is that their lives have to be carved down to one page for text, with the opposite page for a likeness of the woman. This means that sometimes it makes these accomplishments that are so great, seem as though they were achieved with little difficulty. However, this is not too big of an issue for Eleanor and I personally, because even though she is only five, once she is interested in someone or something, we find many books about that topic/person. As she grows, she will have the opportunity to read of these mighty girls in more details. For now, these bite-sized morsels are perfect.

Highly recommended.

NetGalley ARC: You Are Your Strong

I received a free digital ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

Rating: 4 Stars

This book is absolutely beautiful - and not just the illustrations. The whole book, the theme, the words, the pictures, it is all exactly what you want a book about emotions to be for the children who need it. And by need, I don't just mean the ones who need it at that moment, but for all children, who will at some point or another have to deal with emotions that are bigger than they are. As much as we want to, we can't shield them from everything and big emotions are part of growing up. We need to prepare children to handle them in a positive, productive way and this book does wonders for that.

Both the words and illustrations are simple and calm, yet powerful - even magical. Even in its simplicity, the author does a wonderful job of showing children how to regulate their emotions, and how to deal with them, feel them, and not get stuck feeling one kind of way. The author moves through a wide range of emotions, giving children positive ways to overcome the negative thoughts and feelings. I feel like this was well-done, and did not imply that feeling those emotions were bad. I think too often kids feel like they can't or shouldn't be angry or sad. I teach in a self-contained behavior skills classroom; time and again myself and our paraprofessionals explains to our students that emotions are normal and healthy, but we don't want to get stuck on them, and we want to show those emotions and how we feel in a way that is still appropriate and won't hurt anyone, including the person feeling the emotion.

In the beginning we see adults showing the children in the book how to overcome these powerful and sometimes scary emotions. That scaffolding piece is so important, because we have to show children how to regulate these emotions on their own, so they do not become dependent on adults to talk them through it every time. The message that each child has their own Strong, that they can draw on that inner strength to overcome the big, negative feelings, in invaluable. This doesn't mean that we should always expect every child to 'figure it out for themselves', but we must give them the tools and strategies they need to handle overwhelming emotions.

I will definitely be purchasing this book when it comes out, to be able to read with my five year old daughter. I will also be using it in my classroom. Highly recommended!