Sunday, December 30, 2018

The Briefing: Politics, the Press, and the President


Rating: 1 Star

It's exactly as awful as you think it would be.

For the life of me, I can not understand for a single moment how this book became a national bestseller...a Wall Street Journal bestseller...USA Today bestseller...

Because seriously, can trumplethinskin supporters even read?

And with the likes of Megyn Kelly and Sean Hannity, plus trumplethinskin himself saying how great the book is, you know it is a trash fire inside a barrel fire inside a dumpster fire.

It's fucking trash, and written at about a fourth grade comprehension level.

The book summary also claims that "No job is more of a pressure cooker than being a White House press secretary...especially in this White House."

Really? I'm pretty sure that's not actually true. It just so happens that Sean Spicer is a horrible person who lies, lies, lies to further a bullshit agenda from a joke of a 'president'. So, to say his job is tough, when he (and his successor) choose to make it tough by lying constantly, that's on him.

I won't spend too much more time on this trash book, but to share a few 'highlights'. This guy is an even bigger line-towing idiot than we all thought. Who knew that was even possible?

About the Emmy Awards:
"All of them said kind things about my willingness to poke fun at myself. I was actually shocked. I assumed our conversations would be contentious considering their stereotypical politic leanings" (page 249).

So because Spicy and his idiot boss couldn't feign cordiality, no one can?

"It was also a pleasure to see Sarah take the podium. She is very adept at recognizing what works and what doesn't, the needs of the press corps, and the needs of the president. She hit the ground running because she is such a keen observer and a quick learner" (page 245).


"Many people think that Air Force One is always the same plane, Air Force One is the official military designation for whichever aircraft is flying the president" (page 237).

No one thinks that. Everyone knows that Air Force One is a designation because we've all seen the movie "Air Force One".

"Many in the media were creating an environment that felt like the opposition party, less interested in reporting facts than in contesting our positions and trying to undermine and embarrass the administration at every turn" (page 218).

First of all, that's what happens when you straight up LIE. You get corrected, time and again. Alternative facts are not a thing. Alternative facts are not the truth. Secondly, this joke of an administration deserves to be undermined at every turn so we can minimize the damage done by this clown and his minions. Perhaps if Spicer would not have behaved like a petulant child at the briefings, the environment would not have become what it did.

One of my favorite sections was when Spicer addressed the whole meme about him hiding in the bushes from reporters so he would not have to answer more questions about Comey's firing. He explains it much differently, of course, just like he always does, with those alternative facts of his. And he's butt-hurt about being a meme. Big surprise. As such, he also takes a few sentences to lecture us on memes and how they are not nice.


They can make us laugh, and we all share them. However, the  longer I was behind the podium, the more convinced I became that there is something deeply dysfunctional in the way our culture  uses memes to elevate tiny details into national moments of outrage or ridicule that push aside any deeper consideration about policy and simply fairness" (page 203).

"The irony of Johnson's report was that I could've completed the first round of interviews, walked back into the White House, and called it a night. But I knew the press was frustrated and wanted more, and I was intent on answering the questions of reporters who had stayed late. My reward for trying to be helpful to the press was Jenna Johnson inventing a whole-cloth untruth of me hiding in the bushes" (page 211).

Come on now, bruh. You hid in the bushes.

Then we have my personal fave, the Holocaust Centers. Naturally, his explanation makes no sense and it just a bunch of bullshit excuses for being an idiot and terrible human being.

"And the number one rule I gave every Republican was don't ever, ever talk about rape or compare anything or anyone to Hitler or the Holocaust.

Ever" (page 195).

"By this point I was feeling flustered, still not fully understanding what had just happened. My remarks were not quite right, and I had the alarming sense that I was digging myself into a deeper hole with each word.

This may have been the lowest moment I had in the White House. I alone had fumbled; no one else had made me do it" (page 198).

His explanation makes no sense. He says he forgot the key phrase "on the battlefield", when he was talking about Hitler not using chemical weapons. But he continued to talk about Hitler using gas on his own people, which is actually exactly what Assad did. Of course, Hitler used the Holocaust Centers to kill people, while Assad just dropped it in the middle of town. Reporters gave him chances, it was even painful to watch. They repeatedly ask for clarification because I think they realized this would be a huge thing. But he maintains he simply forgot the 'key phrase' of "on the battlefield" when addressing Hitler NOT using chemical weapons.

"Donald Trump may not quote Scripture like an evangelical, but I know he is a man of Christian instincts and feeling. I saw this in his desire to share communion with me" (page 192).


BTW, trumplethinskin could not understand why Spicer wouldn't go to church with him and the others. Apparently 'Mass' is a hard concept to wrap his mind around.

There is one thing about his book that I want to address, the only thing Spicer and I will ever agree on, and that is the idea of confronting these idiots in public, especially when their children are present.

"Rebecca and I could not go out to dinner without being mobbed - and often being told off or getting the finger, even in front of our young children" (page 246).

This is not cool at all and needs to stop. It is 100% NOT okay to accost someone out with their kids in tow. Not at all. I don't mean that it is okay to do so if the kids aren't around, but come the fuck on. Have some common sense.

I will say though, there is a huge difference between screaming at someone and cussing them out in front of their children, and asking them to leave your restaurant. Sorry SarahSandersHuckabeeSandersSmokeyEyeWhatever, you can't go wherever you want, because you are also a lying liar who lies.

As you might have guessed, this book is trash and a total waste of time. I read it only because I just had to see how trash-tastic it was. If I were rating the book by number of trash cans, it would be a five, no contest. But since I am not, this book stinks and I absolutely do not recommend it, unless you need a good laugh.


  1. I'll probably take a look at this one when it comes down in price!

    1. Oh yes, do not spend any money on it AT ALL! If you can get it from the library, do that, it is SO AWFUL.

  2. I'm guessing, you know... reading between the lines and such.... that you didn't like this that much...

  3. It still kills me when I run into evangelicals who are cONVINCED he's a Christian guy *biggest eyerolls ever*

    1. Right?? Semi-related...I read a really great article a few months back called "Don't You Dare Tell Me I'm Not Evangelical" from red Letter Christians, it was everything I have been trying to figure out how to say, especially since this shit-show started. Identifying as an evangelical has such negative connotations and this article was really great in addressing it.


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